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A Tip to Release your Fear of “What Happens to My Child with Special Needs When I Leave the Planet?"

Updated: Dec 7, 2020

Let’s face it. Most of us have had sleepless nights wondering if we will need to be Ghost Mom to continue to support our special needs child like we do now.

What is most desirable is feeling the opposite of fear – a knowing of certainty that your child will not only survive but perhaps even thrive. I am not talking about putting specific plans in place. Yes, this is logistically very important but I am referring to an emotional feeling of certainty that gives you peace of mind that frees your spirit, literally. So, how can I speak truth with such an airy-fairy concept? Because I have personally released the fear and have taught and seen others do the same.

There are specific techniques which change your subconscious thoughts which change your outcomes and even your physiology. One such technique is a Manifesting Tool I have used throughout my journey with my 35-year-old special needs son, Nick.

I learned this technique quite by accident. Years ago, I dreamed of moving my spiritual hypnosis practice out of my home and into a professional building. As I day-dreamed I made a list of everything I wanted in this office. For example: A unique building, with an ideal location on a busy street, with available signage, 4 minutes from my home, and only $300 a month rent. It was fun fantasizing while writing it, but then I stuffed it into my desk drawer and forgot about it.

Two years later I was driving on a busy street. Usually I would make a left at the light to go shopping, but something nudged me to make a right instead. Every time I went to make a U-turn, I didn’t because I kept driving straight. Eventually my mind made a decision to pull into a big Victorian house’s driveway to turn around. When I looked up, I saw a small sign that said “office for rent”. Instinctively I went in and saw a team of architects. The older gentleman owned the building. When I inquired about the rent, he laughed at my $300 offer because he was requesting $1200. However, he did say that he would “think” about it and took my business card. The next week he called to say that when he told his wife, she said, “Give the girl a chance”, and told me I could move in right away. When I was cleaning out my desk draw to make it lighter to carry, the list of what I wanted in my office fell out. EVERYTHING on that list MANIFESTED. I was shocked and thrilled! For I realized just the simple act of writing down what I sincerely desired, and then fantasizing about it, actualized it.

I did this for quite a number of things throughout the years. One day a co-worker was complaining that she was emotionally unfulfilled in her present relationship. I told her to write down her wish list of what she wanted in a mate. To be as specific as possible, no matter how silly it appeared to her, and to keep it in the positive. (Respects and keeps his body clean and healthy instead of No drug or alcohol addictions). She told me she had more than ten characteristics she wanted in her mate. For example: Loves her family, loves his career and makes a good living, a family man, good looking, healthy and athletic, adores and cherishes me, loves to cook, etc. She realized that she was settling with her present boyfriend because he only had two on the list, so she released him. I reminded her to keep it on her refrigerator door so she would see her list every day. A few months later she moved back to the Midwest. I didn’t hear from her until a year later. She was excited to tell me that she got engaged to a guy who was EVERYTHING on her list, but she forgot to add an item that didn’t seem important at the time – a future Mrs..... a name she would enjoy saying. Her fiancé's name was Pigg. We laughed and marveled at the manifestation of her list.

Today I find myself wanting to make a wish list to manifest my future daughter-n-law. I have thought in my mind the specifics of what I would like her to be; a combination of me, my mom, and Annie Sullivan. The traits are easy to write down. I believe my son knows the kind of woman he wants and more importantly needs in order to lead a happy life. Perhaps I will invite him to create this manifestation list together.


1. Compassionate, kind, sweet and easy going

2. Completely loves, admires and respects Nick

3. Organized and has self-discipline

4. Works and enjoys what she does

5. Good nutritional cook

6. Healthy and encourages exercising

7. Drives

8. Loves me, and the whole extended family

9. Similar interests with Nick

10. Good sense of humor

11. Willing and wanting to help Nick succeed in living an independent life

12. Continue to be his greatest friend, lover, and cheerleader

I believe in the efficacy of this technique because it has worked many times in the past. It provides that emotional security that we both need in order to feel comfortable in knowing that when I leave the planet, he will carry on.

If you need more guidance you can privately message me on my Facebook page, or consider buying my upcoming book, No Stone Unturned: How My Special Needs Child and I Transformed Against All Odds. It will be up for sale on November 29, 2020. A pre-sale will also be available. Check out my website or social media pages for updates. God Bless and Good Manifesting!

Debra Taubenslag, Author

No Stone Unturned: How My Special Needs Child and I Transformed Against All Odds

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